Archives for: Forgiveness

Great Again

I looked down, using all possible restraint to not bite back, to avoid defending myself, and simply repeated my previous response, “Please don’t text me anymore right now. Have a good time tonight with the boys.” Then I tossed my phone onto the countertop, face down, and walked away.

This small act of letting go, of non-response, would have felt impossible five years ago. I hate tension and naturally scramble to pacify aggression. I’m also sensitized to accusation, and my … Read more »

Sharing the Burdens

Not long after we married, a picture began to form. I saw the real challenges of our unexpected life meeting the real creativity of a kind God, and wondered if these stories were really just for us alone. Did others need to hear the hope and imagine the possibilities? Was there anyone else out there on their own unexpected journey looking for encouragement and a brighter way forward?

I became convinced that the answer was yes. But could it be … Read more »

Snares

Abandonment. Abuse. Betrayal. Poverty. Family chronic illness.

Papa has faced many great tragedies already in his young life, and yet you would not know upon meeting him. You would first notice his broad smile and caring eyes and be put quickly at ease. He radiates peace and contentment and strength. He has had plentiful reasons to put on bitterness or get stuck seeking justice, or even to just give up entirely. Yet repeatedly, he does not yield to his feelings … Read more »

The One Who Always Gives His Best

Mrs. Pigglewiggle looked over the desk at me with deep, sympathetic eyes. She nodded as I spoke, though a thick coating of hairspray kept the grey curls from budging. She leaned back into her leather wheelchair as I continued.

‘Every good gift this year. New babies, a new (free!) house, a new van, success at work, expensive things, giant tvs & gaming systems, and now even a new church. Sometimes, I just. don’t. get it. How can their choices be … Read more »

Making All Things New

After the eve of turning has been properly celebrated with sparkly drinks and amazing friends, before fixing my mind forward with resolution and strategies for the newborn year , I choose something both simple and profound.

I carve out space for grace.

It is the very best groundwork to lay in a year that I intend to be rich and full and productive. It is the best footing to choose when I intend to be stronger, wiser, and more loving … Read more »

The Highlight Reel

I poked at my chicken pad kai mao with my fork and looked up at our new friends across the table. They had only just met John for the first time, and were asking questions about our custody agreements. It is so lovely to be making new friends together who only know Papa and I now as we are, together: and don’t know the whole long years of mess behind us.

But I am realizing that when I first begin … Read more »

Us and Them

Sunday my littlest pumpkin turned 6; and he had his first all-class party! It was really a drop-off type event at a gym, so all the parents came and went – except for me, John (my ex-husband), his new wife, and Lizzy (Papa’s ex-wife).

Awkward..?!

Yes.

And no. Surprisingly. Two years ago I could probably not have imagined a couple hours together with this group of people, spent so pleasantly  discussing things like the impending birth of my ex-husbands new … Read more »