Archives for: Blended family

Plus Size

Amy Schumer’s objections to the plus-size label received a lot of attention lately. As I turned the words over in my mind, I suddenly had a new framework for my life. Because if anything describes our family, it is certainly Plus Size.

Labeling can be damaging or restrictive; but it can also empower and provide context. This one is dead on for us. Rarely can we eat in a restaurant or book a hotel without a reminder that we are … Read more »

Fairness vs Fullness

I toasted bagels and sliced peaches for chattering mouths this morning while uninvited tears slipped subtly down my cheeks. All week I firmly resisted shards of fear and worry, but today the underlying grief worked its way to the surface.

Tomorrow we enter the courthouse again. More than five years have passed since I stepped into such a room to hear the proclamation of a judge over the content of my life. Much has changed. But I am reminded this … Read more »

The Peace of Christmas Day

Eliot stopped at the edge of the peeling porch step and whirled back around.

“Have a great Christmas, Mom. I’ll miss you.”

Within seconds his arms were wrapped tightly around me.

I savored the briefest moment, the growing gangly boy enveloped in my hug, then stepped back and flashed him a big smile, “I will – and you too! Have a great time at Dad’s, and I’ll see you in just a few days.” He grinned back, turned, and then … Read more »

A year in Plan A+

They watched as Plan A fell away,

and God replaced it with…Plan A.

Our pastor spoke these words over us a year ago today as he joined our lives and families together.
Our friends love to call it Plan A+.

God’s supernatural aptitude to work everything for good still blows my mind. And it is supernatural for sure – heads above any piecemeal makeover plan we could scrap together ourselves. I had asked Him many times in those dark years … Read more »

A Merry Messy Christmas!

Our family watched The Nativity Story for the first time together. I loved seeing this story that I know so well unfold visually and stir up new thoughts, especially as we watched the slow-time, the down-time – the waiting. How many conversations, wonderings, questions, hopes and fears must have come to the surface in all of those moments? The late nights with Elizabeth, the whispers as the baby and her belly grew, questions as miles passed on the way to … Read more »

Farther Along

I am farther along on this journey than I ever expected to be – in healing, in grace, in the entire rebuild. And yet, there are still triggers. Feelings still surface from time to time – ones I so wish were far far behind me. This week there have been many changes and developments, touching quite a few of those triggers. And then last night, Eliot brought home this drawing for me from school. It is a picture of him, … Read more »

The Highlight Reel

I poked at my chicken pad kai mao with my fork and looked up at our new friends across the table. They had only just met John for the first time, and were asking questions about our custody agreements. It is so lovely to be making new friends together who only know Papa and I now as we are, together: and don’t know the whole long years of mess behind us.

But I am realizing that when I first begin … Read more »

Soaking Out the Slivers

The last week or two has been a blur; crazy client deadlines and birthdays galore and company and house construction and rampant illness. Unfortunately, this kind of week is more common that I’d like to think. I’m sure I’m not alone.

When God and I have not had quality time, I begin to feel it. It masquerades as other things, and often is most evident as I begin to feel and even act more like an orphan than a daughter … Read more »